Adolescence is a time of big feelings and learning curves – not just for humans, but for dogs too. As they move through this developmental phase, teaching them to understand boundaries, read social cues of other dogs, and adapt their play styles for different friends is key to raising a socially confident and well-mannered dog.
At Tom and Toto, we believe in positive reinforcement only – rewarding good behaviour, setting clear expectations, and creating safe, enriching spaces to learn.
What does this look like:
- Loose wiggly body language (no stiffness)
- Taking turns – Play is balanced. There is a lot of give-and-take.
- Taking breaks – to sniff, explore, or something other than play
- A mixture of play- chase, lying down, bouncing, play bows, wrestling etc
When your dog makes a good choice – such as backing off when another dog signals discomfort or choosing to recall to you and disengage from play – immediately praise or treat them to reinforce that behaviour.
Teaching Boundaries Through Structure
Rather than punishing rough or over-excited behaviour, we give dogs the chance to reset. A brief pause from play, followed by encouragement to re-engage calmly, teaches self-regulation. Over time, your dog learns that calm, respectful play keeps the fun going.
How to do this:
- Lead your dog away from play and ask them to focus on you (with a reward for doing so)
- Scatter a treat or two on the ground (so long as they don’t have guarding tendencies) to redirect their energy into sniffing which is calming
- Pop them back on lead and take a short walk to go explore something else
Consistently rewarding polite greetings, taking turns, and checking in with you helps dogs understand what earns them attention and approval.
Adapting to Different Dogs
No two dogs play the same way. We expose adolescent dogs to a variety of personalities – from bouncy doodles to chilled-out Cavaliers – so they learn how to shift their energy and communicate appropriately. When they successfully adjust, we mark that with praise or treats to reinforce adaptability.
What does this look like:
- Making themselves smaller by crouching or lying down to play with small dogs.
- Reading when a dog wants to chase or be chased.
- Playing gently with smaller dogs.
- Clearly displaying a play bow and waiting for the other dog to respond.
With consistency, patience, and positive experiences, adolescent dogs grow into thoughtful, socially skilled companions. If you would like more support socialising your adolescent dog come and join the social club! This is a safe secure space for your dog to play and meet lovely friendly other dogs and humans. Staffed sessions each week give you extra peace of mind and our experts on hand to talk to. Find out more HERE
